August 31, 2011 FOR GIRLS ONLY. I MEAN IT. SERIOUSLY. ONLY FOR GIRLS.

Fact: I am 54 years old. FIFTY FRICKIN' YEARS OLD.

Fact: I been having periods for more years than I care to remember. Had I realized this fact AND had any disposable income when I was 12, I would have bought stock in Kotex.

Fact: My periods were always regular, ever;y 28 days AND on every anniversary and every, single out of town trip, I was having a period, regardless of the amount of day counting or pre-planning. I was just special that way!

Fact: On November 18, 1981, I was done having babies. Completely done. No more babies. All done. Thankyouverymuch.

Fact: I have not had a period for the last six months. That's right. The last SIX months. Could it be? Is it possible? Was I finally, finally done with this bullshit?


Fact: No. It was not possible. I was not done with this bullshit. At. All.

Fact: I have, for the past 2 days, been experiencing the mother of all periods. In fact, I checked behind me as I walked to my car tonight after work to make sure that my uterus was not dragging on the ground behind me.

Fact: It wasn't.

Fact: Just thought you'd like to know.

Fact: You're welcome.

Augsut 30, 2011 Playing School for Real

Back in the olden days, I used to play school all the time. I had pretend students and I'd teach them everything I knew -which back then, didn't take all that long.

Christmas and birthday gifts were often teacher supplies: red pens, a big blackboard, grade books, etc.

I loved to play school. I was going to be a teacher.

We all know what happened to that "dream".... I went to law school instead!

I have looked for ways to continue being a teacher. I subbed for a number of years while I was part time in the county attorney's office, for example.

Several years ago, I was hired as a adjunct professor at Highland Community College - Wamego Campus - to teach American Government and Criminal Law.

I love it! LOVE IT!

It's just like playing school only there are real people. And my classroom and bedroom are not the same place.

August 29, 2011 Sunflowers

I was born in Kansas, I was bred in Kansas

and when I get married, I'll be wed in Kansas.

There's a true blue gal who promised she would wait

She's my sunflower from the Sunflower State.

Troubles end in Kansas, folks unbend in Kansas

Everyone you'll meet will be your friend in Kansas.

And they'll all be there to help me celebrate

With my sunflower from the Sunflower State.

P.S. I love Kansas in the fall and I have, for the record, decreed that fall has arrived.

August 28, 2011 Cleaning for Company

The Barnes are coming for Labor Day weekend. We haven't seen them since February so we have a lot of catching up to do.

Although they are family, they are still classified as "company" which requires, by definition, a certain level of pre-visit cleaning.

You know how when you clean for company, you clean things that usually you just ignore? Like those black finger prints on the front door (check), the table cloths on the bedside tables (check) and the tv remotes (check).

I must confess that I have (HAD) the dirtiest tv remotes in the entire universe. The. Entire. Universe.

Since companies a'comin', I had to figure out a way to clean them.

Without the assistance of the internet, I decided to use Qtips and rubbing alcohol (thanks, Luke, for the Qtips) to clean those babies up.

These are the Qtips from ONE remote. ONE of them.

YUCK!

Can I explain? This mess was from the remote in the kitchen. Keep in mind that I am a full contact cook so there are times when I have to touch the remote with dirty hands. I can' be bothered to wash my hands before changing the channel or adjusting the volume, can I? I should say not.

I certainly hope that when Roger and Karin arrive they will comment on the cleanliness of the tv remotes. They'll have clean sheets and towels, so it's not like they'll be on the lookout for anything clean, I just hope they notice the remotes.

Stay tuned. (oh, that's very nearly a pun!!!)

August 27, 2011 New "Kids"

This year, I am a mentor to 3 freshmen at Kansas State. Two of them, Nicki and Haley, came over for supper tonight. (The third one lives at home in Clay Center. She was invited but didn't want to drive all the way to Wamego for dinner. She's clearly never eaten at my table, has she?)

Nicki is from the Chicago area and tomorrow is her 18th birthday. It wouldn't be a birthday without a cake and candles, would it?
I made whole barbecued chickens on the grill. I've never done that before but they were really easy and tasted really good. I just put them on the grill with indirect heat for 2 hours. Then I brushed them with BBQ sauce for about 15 additional minutes. Yummy.

The girls left in time to get back to Manhattan before dark - and it's their first weekend at college, so there are things to do, people to see.

My mom joined us for the evening which was fun. She is always good for a couple of laughs and tonight was no exception.

Laugh #1: She says there is a frog in her house. Seriously. She saw it in the corner and put a basket over it and a bottle of mouthwash on top of the basket. But, she said she was tired, so she left the actual frog disposal until morning. When morning came, she scooted the basket to the front door. Imagine this: my 82 year old mother holding the storm door open, grabbing the basket and tossing it onto the front porch. But, wait! What's this? There is no frog? NO FROG? WTF? Where is the damn frog? The frog is gone. It is still in her house. She swears. I think she's gone around the bend.

Laugh #2: For some reason, she started talking about gangs when she was a kid. Keep in mind that when she was a kid it was in the 30s and "gang" maybe didn't mean exactly what it means today. I asked her if she was in a gang, knowing that the answer had to be no. This is my mom we're talking about her. Well, little did I know.....in high school she was a member of the Dainty Dozen "gang". The Dainty Dozen hung with 12 guys who were known as the Dirty Dozen.

My mother. A gang member. Of a gang with the word "dainty" in the title. Oh. My. God.

We didn't even ask what kind of gang activities they engaged in. Just learning of my mothers' sordid past was enough for one night.

Laugh #3: When she got ready to leave, I was making fun of her "monkey purse". Many, many years ago, Mom got this little change purse as a gag gift. It was clear it was a joke. But, the joke was on me, because she has used it ever since!

Tonight she had it on her arm and I said "Queen Elizabeth, whacha got in your purse there, the keys to the castle?" She opened it up and pulled out her "wallet": her driver's license and about 5 credit cards held together with a rubber band! That did me in.

Clearly, Luke is wondering what his grandmother is going to say or do next.

Aren't we all.

Stay tuned for the next chapter of "There's a Frog in My House that a Basket Can't Hold".

August 26, 2011 Before We Get a New Yard....

..we have to kill the old one.

You may not know this, but last fall we had a new yard put in. Crabgrass had defeated the "real" grass and I was pissed every time I looked at the mass of weeds CB was watering and mowing on a regular basis.

A local landscape company came and killed the weeds/yard. Once it was D E A D, they dug it up and planted new grass.

We watered and watered and pretty soon up came the most beautiful green grass. It was like green velvet. I didn't want anyone to walk on it. I told CB to figure out a way to mow it without touching it.

But. Then. There. Was. A. Problem.

We discovered that the grass seed had been contaminated with some kind of weed. YIKES! And the weed was throughout the yard, not just in one or two places. It looked bad.

When I called the landscape company they said that they'd replace the yard at no charge. YAHOO!!! But, they have to kill the weeds/yard before they can dig it up and replant grass.

Killing the grass isn't such a tough job this go around because we haven't watered since we learned we were getting a new lawn. Our yard was approaching death by drought. If our lawn had been on life support, we would have pulled the plug about 2 months ago.

Oh, and if the past predicts the future: about a week after reseeding the lawn the first time, it rained about 10 inches in 27 minutes.

So, when our lawn is in, don't go anywhere without your umbrella.

August 25, 2011 KSU Delta Sigs

This evening I was honored to be a guest at the Delta Sig house. The new members wanted me to talk about their legal rights and how to stay out of my office!

I love the Delta Sigs!

And, if CB is ever hit by a bus, I'll be their house mom. Hopefully, they will not do a background check or ask for references.

Can't you just imagine me as a house mom? It. Would. Be. A. Hoot.

CB better look both ways before he crosses the street.

August 25, 2011 CB's Banana

I know, I know, you were totally expecting something else. Shame on you.

Did you know that you can write on a banana with a toothpick or the tip of a knife and it will turn brown where you broke the skin?

There it was: a poor, unsuspecting, nondescript banana on the counter, destined for CB's lunch box.

I couldn't let it go to the great banana beyond without giving it it's 15 minutes of fame.

For several minutes I thought about what to write.

"Save me"?

"My name's Bob"?

"Help! I'm being help prisoner inside this banana!"?

"CB, I like your banana"? (That was my favorite. I'm a little warped that way.)

"Your ad here"

So many choices and I went with "love you". Good for me.

CB thought it was funny.

But I'm sure at 5 a.m. this morning as he was putting his lunch together, he rolled his eyes and wondered why I don't have better things to do with my time.

With good reason.

August 24, 2011 Not What I Thought I'd Write

When I took this picture on my way to work, I took it because it made me laugh. It's the infamous Roadrunner that hauls people between Manhattan and Kansas City International Airport. It spends almost as much time broken down by the side of the road as it does actually moving.

I was driving behind this Roadrunner van, watching it belch black smoke and it just tickled me. When something tickles me, I reach for my camera!

That would have been the end of it. Except that it wasn't.

It wasn't because I had lunch with some really special people.

Background: Jim and Lois are dear friends. Such good friends that Jim was sworn in as a judge pro tem in order to perform our wedding ceremony (and my "our", I mean CB and me. Just trying to keep things clear.) A year or so ago, Lois was diagnosed with cancer and had chemo and radiation treatment. She's doing really well now and has the greatest new hair (and by "new", I mean new as in brand new, just grown, sort of like bunny fur. Oh, it's okay that I call it that, Lois did.)

Marjorie is a dear friend as well. She and I share the same birthday...a few years apart, but the same day. She's is the best person to share a birthday with! She never forgets me! We've had some fun birthday parties and we even had a Birthday Box that travels between the two of us, complete with decorations, party hats, favors, candles, Whoopie cushions, 2 birthday tiaras. It's quite a box!

Earlier this summer, Marjorie was diagnosed with cancer. She gets chemo for 5 hours every third Wednesday.

Today is one of those Wednesdays.

Jim picked up sandwiches and me and we went to the oncology center. Soon Lois arrived with drinks and we had a party!

While the conversation could have been maudlin and focused on illness and treatments, it wasn't. Those topics were mentioned, but not dwelt on. We talked about our kids. We talked about past parties. We talked about why I haven't planned a fall bar association party. We talked about everything.

Marjorie shared that her dear father (who is in his mid 90s and has packed a whole lot of living into those years) was moved to a hospice unit in Florida yesterday. She knows that a trip to Florida is in her near future.

That's where Roadrunner comes in.

Marjorie said she would just take the Roadrunner to KCI to catch a flight to Florida. I started laughing and explained my Photo of the Day was a black smoke belching Roadrunner and that there was NO WAY IN HELL I was going to let her take the Roadrunner, especially right after getting chemo when she could be more susceptible to germs. I promised to drive her and pick her up in a vehicle where the only thing belching would be me (and by "vehicle" I do NOT mean the car that was shoveled out on Saturday but still full of who knows what kind of germs).

I was in the presence of greatness for the hour and half we were together. The warrior and the victor. Marjorie and Lois. Women who have fought and are fighting the good fight. Their strength strengthened me today. My attitude was adjusted. My perspective was put back into focus.

Life is good. My life is good. Lois' hair is good. Marjorie's hair is good (and by "hair" I mean her new wig that looks perfect for her. Per. Fect. Quick story: Marjorie said that she has to take her wig off when she bakes because she's afraid that if she opens the oven to check on what's inside, her wig will melt to her head! "You can't get that much acrylic close to a heat source without asking for trouble!")

This isn't what I thought I'd be writing about. Lois and Marjorie changed that.

August 23, 2011 My Favorite Corner

I went to the grocery store today.

More specifically, I went to the produce department today.

In addition to the apples, oranges, grapes and bananas, I got lettuce, peaches, and salad.

No pineapples because Dillons was sold out. Luke was not happy. He has become a fresh pineapple kind of guy.

All these goodies made friends will all the veggies currently in the fridge.

Don't get excited....there are 3 bags of potato chips on the counter as well!

I loved, loved, LOVED putting all this fresh produce on the conveyor belt at the check out line.

The Toll House Turtle Cookies were simply the icing on the cake!

August 22, 2011 They're Baaaack!

Students are back.

Every one of the 23,000 students at Kansas State has a car and they were all on Bluemont this afternoon. Only 3% of the cars today had any idea where they were going.

I was one of the 3%. For a change.

School started today so the campus was full of life and people and bright shining faces. I love the promise that a new school year brings.

New pencils and new shoes. New backpacks and clean notebooks.

Clean criminal records that soon have blemishes like Minor in Possession of Alcohol or Peeing in Public.

Manhattan's population doubles or triples when school is in session. But still no bus system, no mandatory rental inspections, no consideration of the students at all by the powers that be. Manhattan City Commission, you now who you are.

A college town should be a mecca for speakers and concerts and plays and wonderful learning opportunities. I think Manhattan missed the boat on all counts.

Now wait a minute. Bill Clinton spoke there so WOO HOO for that.

I'm glad the students are back. There's a life in the city that isn't there during the summer. Remind me that I said that when I am bitching about waiting for a table at Olive Garden!

August 21, 2011 Adventures in Wokking (Woking?)

Citrus Beef Stir fry.

Yummy.

Marinaded sirloin strips.

Carrots and onions.

Orange juice, brown sugar, soy sauce.

Smoke.

Splatters.

More smoke.

Luke saying something smells good.

Brown rice on the back burner.

Everything piled together on one plate.

Luke announcing "This is a do over."

Note: A "do over" in our family means it was so wonderful we want to do it again. It does not mean do it over because it was so bad.

Just sayin'.

August 20, 2011 Like a Clown Car Only with Trash

The time was long past. Long, long past.

Saturday afternoon, with lots of better things to do, I decided to clean out my car.

My car and I are wonderful friends. I spend more time with my car than with just about anyone. It's sad, but true.

When I need to throw something away and I am in my car, I sling it over into the backseat. Doesn't everyone? However, when I get to wherever I am going, I don't reach into the backseat, grab my trash and throw it away. Pluh-ease. Who does that?

After a while I am faced with 2 choices. One, clean out my damn car. Or, two, apply for one of those toxic waste labels. Unfortunately, I think the toxic waste sticker would clash with my Obama and End the War bumper stickers, so I am forced to clean.

One benefit of shoveling out the backseat, I found several travel coffee mugs that I thought had gone missing.

Now that my car is suitable for passengers, I better find some soon. My backseat generates trash like Dubya Bush generated lies.

It'll be full again in no time.

August 19, 2011 Buddy and His T-Bone

Last Saturday at CB's summer office party, we collected T-bones. Not the steaks, just the bones.

Fortunately, we got the bones off of plates (I say if people walk away from their plates and leave food on said plate, that food is up for grabs) and didn't have to dumpster dive for any. Although, I had my eye on one and had CB turned his back for just one moment, I would have gone for it.

Tonight was the end of a very long week. Buddy worked hard all week, on the couch, off the couch, up the stairs, in the basement. Bless his heart.

He deserved a t-bone tonight.

It took about an hour, but he defeated that bone.

There is no picture of me grabbing the bone in an attempt to make him look up towards the camera. The reason there is no picture is because he was not happy that I was trying to A. take his bone away and B. take his damn picture again.

I figured a bloody stump was not worth a picture of my dog.

This time.

August 18, 2011 Don't Tell Curtis.....

CB came home to what he thought was a home cooked meal.

Do not tell him otherwise.

Fried chicken from Dillon's.

Country Crock mashed potatoes.

Gravy from an envelope. An envelope! How does that even work?

In my defense, this morning I did throw together a cucumber and onion salad that had to marinate all day. I should get some points for thinking ahead a little bit.

As we were eating, CB was looking around the kitchen wondering where all the dirty dishes were. I'm a full contact cook and he knows it. Tonight there was no path of destruction through the kitchen. Or anywhere else, for that matter. (Sometimes I cause collateral damage in others areas of the house.)

CB's not a complete idiot so I think he might be on to me; but he's a good husband so he'll never say a word.

August 17, 2011 My Favorite Bathroom

Tonight I had pizza with Jack and Tina Turner (not that Tina Turner) which I do every now and then because Jack and I get haircuts together. No, I don't know why and yes, I know it's sort of strange. But, at the end of the day, there's pizza so who cares?

The Turner's live in an old funeral home in Alma. It's a wonderful, huge stone house and I love it! One of my favorite rooms of the house is the bathroom on the main floor.

Sounds crazy, I know. Keep reading.

Jack built the bathroom under the stairs, so you know it's small.

Here's the door. You can see the stairs going up in the upper right corner.

This picture is taken from the door.

I told you the bathroom was small.

You might be asking "Where is the sink? How do you wash your hands?"

Never fear......Jack thought of everything.

You open the double doors above the toilet:

Then you slide the sink out - so it's over the toilet.

It's amazing. Sometimes I go in the bathroom just to wash my hands or play with the sink.

True story: I took my mom to Alma to see Jack's fence. While we were there, I kept asking her if she needed the bathroom. (She's 82, you never know.) Finally, I just said "Come look at this" and marched her into the house and showed her this crazy fun bathroom.

Not only is Jack the funniest human being on the planet, he is also pretty handy.

Tina is the most patient person in the universe because being married to the funniest human being on the planet is not easy. At. All. Tina will also tell you that Jack is only handy in very slow motion, but that's another story.

August 16, 2011 Somewhere Over the Rainbow

I love rainbows. Doesn't this one look like it ends right at the Alumni Center?

Rainbows means there was some rain which means that there was some relief from the heat and drought.

One time when Luke was just a little guy, he wanted to chase a rainbow to see if we could find the pot of gold. We drove and drove and he would tell me where to turn and where to go. It was fun. We never did find that pot of gold but we had a great time looking for it.

Random rainbow information: I have 2 favorite scenes from "The Wizard of Oz". The first is Dorothy singing "Somewhere Over the Rainbow" - - brings me to tears every time. Surely there is a place where troubles melt like lemon drops. Isn't there?

My second favorite scene is when Glinda sings to the Munchkins about Dorothy: "Kansas, she says, is the name of her star."

Kansas is the name of my star, too.

August 15, 2011 KU Gnome Arrives at 901 Lilac Lane

At the Tribunal meeting last February in San Antonio, CB won the Tribunal Trivia game. The prize was custody of a KU garden gnome until the next Tribunal.

Since Don and Jan didn't come to the 2011 Tribunal, and Jan got custody of the gnome in 2010, he didn't make it to our house until Don delivered him on a visit from Denver.

Today the gnome arrived and there was much rejoicing.

This little guy will now travel with us and have his picture taken in all kinds of places and with all kinds of people. You can count on seeing him here occasionally.

It's almost like the stork made a delivery at our house only without the crying and diapers. By anyone.

And we can put this "kid" in a suitcase when we travel.

August 14, 2011 Fire in the Hole. Seriously.

Tonight we are having Cedar Plank Grilled Salmon.

This is interesting for several reasons. First, I do NOT eat fish. Second, I do NOT cook fish. Third, I have never fixed grilled salmon, cedar plank or otherwise.

But, Luke and I decided that we could do this together. I am not sure what possessed us to think that, but we did.

First step: soak the cedar plank. It was too big for the kitchen sink, so Luke put it in the bathtub. We put a brick on top of it to keep in under the water.

You should know that I have several recipes on the counter, I've watched a youtube video and have talked to my personal food writer in Atlanta (Thanks, Kimber) so I am totally confident in what we are doing.

Maybe not totally confident, but sort of confident in a WTF kind of way.

Second step, preheat the grill on high for 10 minutes. Done.

Third step, put the soaked plank on the grill for 5 minutes until it starts to pop and smoke.

This is where the wheels started to fall, er, burn off.

In about 30 seconds, the popping started and there was a little smoke, but not what I expected.

Luke opened the grill, and the whole plank was on fire!

Not to be dissuaded, we sprayed the plank with water and put the salmon on it.

More fire. A lot more fire. A whole lot more fire.

Too much fire.

So, we baled on the cedar plank. Actually, we didn't' have a choice since it was on fire. Seriously on fire. Luke turned on the hose and grabbed the flaming plank, dropped it in the yard and put out the fire. The rabbits living under the deck were all more than a little nervous. Frankly, I was more than a little nervous. Luke was laughing too hard to be nervous!

Fourth step: get the seafood/vegetable grill pan from the kitchen and go to Plan B.

Fifth step: take perfectly grilled salmon off the grill.

CB and Luke said the salmon was good. It looked good, but at the end of the day, it was fish.

And I don't do fish.

August 13, 2011 How Young is Too Young?

CB and I went to his office summer party tonight.

There was a kiddie pool filled with ice and beer. Lots and lots of beer.

This little guy loved to dive into the pool in search of a can of Coors for his dad. He would pass up Coors Light, Bud, Bud Light, and Mike's Lemonade while hunting for a can of Coors.

He was so happy when he found it!

Perhaps he will have a future as a bartender.

August 12, 2011 New Place to Nosh

Maybe it's not so new, but it's certainly new to me....."Ingredients" next to Ray's Apple Mart is an amazing place to eat.

Luke, David Austin (my summer law clerk) and I went there for lunch. David calls it "gourmet fast food". It was that and so much more.

This is Luke's cheeseburger....complete with fried egg, bacon and pepper jack cheese.

This is my chicken salad - - cranberries, pecans, grapes, celery, whole grain bread.

Would have been healthy had I selected low fat cottage cheese or an apple to be my side dish.

But who wants healthy on Friday?

Not me.

Or Luke!

August 11, 2011 Visitor from Afar.

One of the great things about working on a college campus is the visits from former students who used to hang around my office.

Today, this guy appeared at my door. Very movie star, secret agent looking, isn't he?

It's Wayne Stoskopf, a former vice president of the student body. He's a Washington, D.C. hot shot now. Too bad that it's with the wrong party and for a congresswoman who isn't smart enough to find her way out of a phone booth.

But, she was smart enough to hire Wayne and he's smart enough to know that moderation is an important quality.

Wayne has a big cross to bear what with being a republican and the same party as the idiots who are ruining this country, state and city.

Oh yeah, we talked about Gov. Brownshirt and the whack jobs who are on the Manhattan city commission. Wayne shared my frustrations with the local clowns.

The longer we talked, the more we agreed on.

I mean, the more he agreed with me!

Isn't it a great day when people agree with me? I think so, too.

August 10, 2011 Back to School Shopping

Luke asked me earlier this week if we could go back to school shopping in Topeka. I took today off work and we headed to Topeka.

Luke and I spent the first 3 years of his life together in Topeka. Like he has lots of memories of Liberal, I have many of Topeka. Not just from our life together there, but also from the years of visiting my grandparents.

My Grandpa Judge and Grandma Ada lived across the street from the law school. As a student at Washburn, it was a nice feeling each morning to see the house where my grandparents lived and where I visited them many, many times.

Their house on McVicar had a brick chimney and in that chimney was embedded a big, black wrought iron "S". I thought it was soooooo cool!

The big "S" is still there.

A fellow law student bought this house and had an engineer come look to see if the "S" could be removed. She said that she'd give it to me.

But, it is there until the chimney comes down. However, when that day comes, I'll be waiting to pick up that "S" give it a new home.

Oh, and we had a grand time shopping for school stuff and just hanging out in Topeka. More than one laugh and more than one eye-roll.

We drove by the house where we lived during law school. The neighborhood is still bad although less bad during the day. And less bad when your child is not an infant but a gigantic, weight-lifting, bad guy's ass kicking, protect his mother at all costs kind of child. I mean, man.

Love you, Luke.

August 9, 2011 What the Photo Doesn't Show

The best thing about this photo is what is doesn't show.

It doesn't show the storm clouds on the horizon, promising rain tonight.

It doesn't show the temperature of 80 degrees at 8:00 p.m. Much different from the 112 degree days of last week.

It doesn't' show that CB was home early today from the Project from Hell. He was home early because he went left this morning at 1:00 a.m., A.M., for a deck pour (something about concrete on a bridge deck, I think) which took place at 3:00 a.m.

It doesn't show Buddy running around in the yard, chasing whatever is floating and flying around.

Maybe next year my blog should be What Photos Don't Show.

Or not.

August 8, 2011 Most Popular Girl at the Dance

I think this looks like I have IN boxes on my desk that are filled with cupcakes. Frankly, I love that idea.

Unfortunately, that's not the case. These are some of the cupcakes I baked for the RA Resources Fair today.

My office smelled like a cupcake factory. A good smell, if I do say so myself!

This is a picture of the Student Legal Services table at the resource fair. I thought it looked pretty good. Made contact with 90 RAs who, I'm sure, will be using my business card.

I had some great conversations as I handed out information and cupcakes. I also thought about the fall of 1976 when I started my RA career at Fort Hays. No underage drinking problem then. We could drink at 18. For better or for worse, we could drink.

Curtis was glad to see that I brought cupcakes home. Too bad Luke isn't a cupcake eater, or that his birthday isn't this week.

I have enough cupcakes left over for his whole class.

Funny story: my table was in between K State Healthy Decisions and a dietitian who advocates healthy eating! Oh yeah, baby, the old, fat lawyer is handing out cupcakes.

We'll see who the RAs remember!

August 7, 2011 Cupcakes, Part 2

All the cupcakes frosted in short order this morning.

I was surprised that it didn't take as long as I thought to make the frosting and frost 10 dozen cupcakes.

If I had the right kind of kitchen, I could most certainly bake cupcakes for a living.

These cupcakes aren't fancy - just white and chocolate, but they look pretty and will be fun with my card stuck in the icing. The resource fair is going to be in the Union courtyard which is right outside my office door. Isn't that convenient?

In case you are wondering about how they will get to Manhattan, I can tell you: CB is going to help me deliver them tonight. I have them in beer box flats and they'll be cool in my office.

It's true. I've thought of everything!

August 6, 2011 You Gotta Have Friends

This morning I was up and at 'em by 8:30. Jennifer Gould (that's her maiden name) was coming from Kansas City and we were headed to my office. Jennifer was going to help me get a case management plan in place.

Years ago, maybe 8, Jennifer was a student at Kansas State and interviewed me for a speech. She had dreams of law school, so she asked if she could hang out in my office to get a feel for what a lawyer does. From that was born a friendship that has stood the test of time, distance and the fact that I am older than her mother!

The first thing we did when she arrived was the Drive of Shame as she took me to get my car. There it was sitting all alone in the parking lot. The parking lot between the police station and Rambler's. Do you think the cops ran my license plate a time or two during the night?

Then we spent about 4 hours at my office. Jennifer knew the questions to ask and has the skills to set up the program. With her help, at any time during the school year, I will be able to determine the number of open and closed cases, what kind of cases, how many international students, etc. etc. Jennifer is a genius. A kind, patient, supportive genius. Everyone should have a Jennifer in their life.

Jennifer is also pregnant so another genius is on the way!

When I got home, I started on my project for the resident assistant's resource fair which is Monday morning. Legal Services is most certainly a resource for RAs.

My idea is to bake and frost cupcakes for 90 RAs and 30 staff members then put one of my business cards in the frosting. Cute, huh!

List of things to do: bake 120 cupcakes; laminate 120 business cards; frost 120 cupcakes; tote them all to Manhattan.

This afternoon, I baked cupcakes.

(This is less than half of the cupcakes, in case you were planning to count them.)

This evening, I laminated business cards.

And wondered why I'm so damn creative.

August 5, 2011 At The End of the Day!

As many of you know, I am not a big drinker. Oh, I've done my time at the open end of a beer bottle, but I'm too old for the day after.

However, however, today I made an exception. A very big exception.

Scott Kohl is a friend of mine from Highland Community College. He's the Grand Master there and I am a lowly peon, but that works for us.

It looks like my American Government class is going to go this fall, and I wanted to talk to Scott about some changes at HCC/Wamego. We decided to "talk" at Rambler's.

I arrived at 5:30, half an hour behind Scott. We got down to business. His business: Crown and Coke. My business: Vodka and Cranberry Juice. Bartender: Emily.

Topic discussed: HCC, disc golf, hometowns, Catholic high schools, should we order nachos?, politics, why anyone would be a republican, Scott's history in Manhattan, rental properties, yes we should order nachos, what kind of shots (yes, that's shots, with an "s") should we try, isn't it funny how entertaining we are to everyone else in the bar?, and oh look, Curtis is here!

When I called Luke at 8:30 - to tell him I would not be home in an hour as I had promised when I left at 5:30 - I told him that he'd need to come get me when the time came. He said he would and hung up laughing.

I talked to CB at some point and he said that he and his golf partner (he played in a golf tournament this afternoon) were going to come down for dinner. At some point I turned to my left and he was sitting there. It was like magic!

I did have my wits about me at some point in the evening to go to my car and get my camera so I could have a picture of the day.

No thanks necessary.

August 4, 2011

CB and I had lunch together this afternoon in Aggieville. As I was leaving, I noticed this sign.

What makes it worth to be a picture of the day is that the Lucas Maddy band is playing tomorrow.

Lucas Maddy is a former student body president at Kansas State.

The only thing I remember about him is that I saw him in city court when he appeared on a driving while suspended ticket.

I have spent not one single moment wondering whatever became of him.

I just looked at the sign again....could it be that on August 5 the Lucas Maddy band will be hiring?

Wonder what they pay....

August 3, 2011 I am so Very, Very Lucky

I had the honor this evening to attend a dramatic reading of "Any One of Us:Words from Prison" at the women's prison in Topeka.

My friend, Sheila Hochhauser got an email about the event and asked me to go along. I am so glad I did.

My presence in the prison was a bit of a miracle since we had to send in a visitors clearance form. By the time I got done listing all my names, I figured the red flags would be flying and the alarm bells would be going off. Seriously, who has that many former names? What do you mean she married the same guy twice? (Oh. Yes. I. Did.)

However, I was cleared much to my relief, and Sheila and I headed for Topeka.

There were 7 women who performed in front of a crowd of lawyers, judges and others, mostly women. Their words were powerful; painting disturbing pictures of abuse both sexual and physical at the hands of brothers, fathers, boyfriends and husbands.

My life is good. In spite of the special hell that is my job, my life is very, very good. I am secure in my marriage, my home, my relationship with Luke.

My heart goes out to these women who were, through no fault of their own, thrust into lives of violence and abuse. How bad the situation must be to feel that killing your abuser is the only way to protect yourself and your children.

I felt honored to be in the presence of these women who had lived through more horror than I can ever imagine and came out the other side. I do not deny that they committed and were convicted of crimes, but I was left with the feeling that the sentences for many of them were unfair.

August 2, 2011 Can't Photograph a Smell

The roof of the student union caught on fire last night.

The smell of the burnt roof was in the air today.

It smelled like burnt rubber. Only worse.

This is the glass portion of the student union roof. They were, apparently, unsuccessful in setting this portion of the roof on fire.

Did I mention the smell?

The last time I smelled that smell was at the party when I burned my pre-surgery bras. Imagine this: old sneakers, maybe 32 pairs. Set on fire. Fire burns for several hours. Sneakers become like the burning bush in the Old Testament and are never consumed. So the smell just keeps going and going and going.

Wonder what the roofers were burning?

On second thought, I don't want to know.

August 1, 2011 Can You Guess......

where this pop machine is located?

In the Kansas State University Student Union perhaps?


Did I ever mention that I know 3 former Willie Wildcats?

Oh yes I do.

This is special because the identity of Willie is kept top secret. In one week, I discovered that I knew 3. Not one. Not two. But THREE WILLIE WILDCATS. One more thing, the name is not Willie THE Wildcat, but Willie Wildcat.

The lesson is over which is a good thing because that's all I know.

Except for all the words to the fight song.

And that's all I know.

I mean it.

July 31, 2011 Two Mandatory Liberal Experiences

Because Luke and Shirla and I would go to The Pancake House for breakfast nearly every weekend, it was predetermined that we could go there on Sunday morning. When Luke was little he always, always, got 10 dollar pancakes and wiggly bacon.

And that's what he got today. Well, add biscuits and gravy and take off the wiggly bacon!

It was fun. Brought back a lot of memories.

Then, we had to drive by National Beef, the source of most of the smells of Liberal. This picture is of half of the plant. I couldn't get the whole thing in one photo.

After this, our trip was complete.

Luke had strolled and driven down Memory Lane and found it pleasant.

Good for him.

July 30, 2011 Fun, Fun, Fun, FUN!!!!

My hometown of Dodge City now has a casino and resort. I'm not so sure about the resort part, but the casino, oh yeah, it has a casino.

Shirla, Phil, Luke and I drove to Dodge from Liberal so we could a) eat at El Charro and b) go to the casino.

Shirla and Phil are seasoned casino-goers while Luke and I sort of wandered around with our eyes glazed over and mouths gaping open!

I played several slot machines and lost, won, lost, lost money. But then I pulled twice on a nickle machine and WON!!! One hundred and thirty dollars!!! I cashed out with $117.75. I thought that was pretty good.

I'm glad Luke was with me because otherwise, I'm afraid I would still be there.....winning, losing, losing, losing, losing.....

Now, about Liberal.

Liberal is the city from which Dorothy blew away in the Wizard of Oz. Not Wamego. Luke is insistent that we get the word out. Liberal owns the Yellow Brick Road. Not Wamego. Liberal has the OZtober Fest. Not Wamego.

This is Dorothy. Proof that she used to live here.

Speaking of living here. And by "here" I mean Liberal.

This is the house we lived in with the pool and jacuzzi. It was an amazing house. We put in the yard and took out a bunch of ugly bushes in the front.

Luke walked through the alley and discovered that the people who live there filled in the pool. Can you imagine? A beautiful pool with a pool house (with a bathroom) and an adjoining jacuzzi filled in. With dirt. Planted to grass. WTF?

The 2 days we were in Liberal the temperature was above 100 degrees each day. I bet they wished they had that pool after all.
Then, Luke and I moved to a house on Webster which was a great house as well. Luke has wonderful memories of this house and especially the backyard.

We sold this house when we moved to Wamego. It didn't have the white fence and the shutters were gray instead of whatever color they are now.

It was fun listening to Luke talk about all the things he remembers about living in Liberal. I suppose that's what it's like for CB when I talk about Dodge City.

Now I can add "I won $117.75 at the casino!" to my Dodge City stories. Perhaps it will take the place of the time I got Dad's car stuck in the sand of Arkansas River while looking for the KEDD (local radio station) treasure.

But I doubt it.