So, when I learned that my buddy, Matt King, would be in the motherland during the week leading up to The Wedding, I put in my order for wedding shit. I mean, wedding memorabilia.
He sent a couple of facebook messages saying that purchases had been made - but there is a lot of distance between Matt purchasing wonderful Wedding mementos and having them in my hot, little hand. (No offense, Matt.)
Yesterday, though, yesterday was like Christmas. Matt's sister came by my office and delivered the goods.
Oh. My. God.
Here's a composite shot of the wonderful, cheesy, just for tourists crap that Matt got for me. As you are feasting your eyes on this bounty, keep in mind that a guy who is totally NOT a tourist in London had to pick up these spoons and stand in line. He had to pay for it and walk out of the store with it, all the while ignoring the eye-rolling and snarky remarks about crazy Americans.
Here's a close up of the 2 collectible spoons. Good picture of the Duchess, but Wills looks like he just had an appointment with his proctologist. That just increases the cheese factor, if you ask me. The higher the cheese factor, the better the stuff.
This is a china thimble. It's made in England out of bone china. None of this Made in China crap for these newly weds. Glad I have this in case I need to darn any socks.
This cup is pretty good, actually. I think Matt used most of his cheese allotment on the spoons and the thimble. On second thought, though, do you know anyone who has memorialized their wedding day by putting their faces on a cup? Maybe that, in and of itself, raises the cheese content.
Although I love, love, love everything Matt gave me, I must admit that I am disappointed that he didn't come through with Cate and Will vomit bags (but he did send me a link so I can buy them myself), Cate and Will face masks (really, I would have worn that joke out pretty fast) or Royal Wedding condoms.
Royal. Wedding. Condoms.
Now, that would have been something to pass on to my grandchildren.
Royal Wedding condoms to go with the glow in the dark condom I've been saving for a special occasion.
Shit. The Royal Wedding could have been the special occasion. Shit.
Thanks, Matt. Love you.
